Monday, October 6, 2008

Rumors and Gossip

After a full day of dealing with kids and trying to help them with their social problems through character education, I have little patience for adults with poor social skills.  This week, a very close colleague of mine is experiencing an important milestone in her life.  In order to honor her in this time, another close colleague and I organized a small surprise dinner for her on Friday at a restaurant near the school.  We invited only close friends and colleagues because that's what she would have wanted (and did want).  I sent the invitation discretely via evite and made a point to mention that it would be a "small gathering."  I thought the fact that the invitees could see the list of other guests (and the list was small) as well as the fact that I specifically said it would be a small gathering,  would send the message home to people that this is not open to the whole school.   In addition, it was a surprise and I told people to stay quiet about it, not to mention the fact that it was at a restaurant and not at the school.  

Anyway, needless to say,  people found out.  NOBODY came up to me and said, "Hey I hear your honoring our colleague, I'd love to help out or contribute," or "It would be important for me to share this moment with her."  NO, none of that.  They didn't even congratulate her and most had no idea about this big milestone.  Instead, they started gossiping about "who was invited and who wasn't."  It became this popularity thing and now everyone thinks that I am stuck up and exclusive.  The secretaries especially are upset and have (I believe) purposely been rude to me this week.  It is a really bad thing to be on your school secretaries bad side.  I guess I'll get them Starbucks cards at the holidays.  It usually appeases them until the end of the year.

Anyway, needless to say, the dinner was amazing and my colleague was touched and surprised.  It was a truly beautiful moment that I will never forget.  I do not regret not inviting the negative gossipy people, I wish they would just stop talking about it.  It's a waste of my energy and takes away from this special time for my colleague.

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